How to Put It Together Into One Neat Tweet.
Here are a couple I had before:
1) Seek Ye First is an amateur sleuth mystery featuring a group of twentysomethings that takes place partially within a virtual gaming environment like a mystery-themed Second Life.
But who is the main character? What is the mystery? Why should we care?
2) It’s the eve of the year’s most hotly anticipated video game release, and someone’s trying to permanently delete the game’s reclusive lead designer. . . .
Is the designer the main character? If not, that's a problem with this pitch.
Now on to experiment with the new method.
3) When someone tries to kill a secretive computer game designer, her coffee drinking, baby-sling-wearing friend tries to figure out who's trying to kill her friend . . . and stop him.
Eh. This is awkward and it's hard to tell which is the main character.
4) When someone threatens her computer geek friend, a coffee drinking, baby-sling-wearing, distracted new mom dives into a virtual world to try to figure out who's behind the threats - and violence.
This is a little better, though it still needs work. And it doesn't really describe my book very well.
I suspected some of the weak points of this novel, and seeing the results of the worksheet below confirms my suspicions.
Feel free to share your log lines here, or just comment on mine!
New Release Spotlight: Amber Wardell
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Happy release day to debut author Amber Wardell! BEYOND SELF CARE POTATO
CHIPS addresses the toxic self-care culture that tells women bubble baths
and ...
3 weeks ago
7 comments:
It's not exactly a log line, but I'm looking for a something short and quick to put on bookmarks. The more I think, the less I come up with... ;)
Have you ever tried Kathy Carmichael's pitch generator?
http://www.kathycarmichael.com/generator.html
Personally, I think you're on the right track, but you'd probably have fun with the pitch generator. ;)
Oh, that looks fun. Thanks, Barrie.
And good luck with your bookmark!
Apparently we just don't have any attention span anymore. Library Journal has started to add "verdicts" to their reviews: http://www.libraryjournal.com/article/CA6660900.html. As if a review isn't short enough anyway??? If you actually read any of these verdicts in the last two issues of LJ, they're almost as long as the review itself. Meh.
Apparently we just don't have any attention span anymore. Library Journal has started to add "verdicts" to their reviews: http://www.libraryjournal.com/article/CA6660900.html. As if a review isn't short enough anyway??? If you actually read any of these verdicts in the last two issues of LJ, they're almost as long as the review itself. Meh.
Keri, that's a little depressing.
My suggestion would be to start with the description of your character. Then go on to explain what happens to her.
"Sally is a coffee-drinking, baby-sling-wearing, [etc]. When somebody threatens her secretive computer-geek friend, Sally has to dive into a virtual world and figure out [etc]."
Brian, yeah, my actual pitch starts much like that and is a little more readable. I was trying to condense it into one tweet-like sentence, but using at least 2 is working a bit better for me. Perhaps because I write novels and don't Twitter. :)
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