Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Mother Earth (or, Bosoms)

A couple of weeks ago, I went shopping for some summer clothes. I came home with a dress to wear to a wedding, two pairs of long shorts, and three knit tops. All three shirts are patterns in shades of green and blue. I noticed this at the store and thought, why not? Clearly, these are the colors I'm drawn to this summer; I'll just wear green and blue until my recurrent autumnal fetish for brown sets in. And as I've been wearing the new shirts, it's not been the colors, exactly, that's bothering me.

The first shirt (not pictured) is a v-neck t-shirt. In the store I thought the wide hem at the V was a nice detail. Once I wore it out in public, however, I realized that it looks like a scrub top. Not exactly the look I was going for.

The second shirt is my favorite. I've already worn it 3 times, and on the third occasion I realized that the pattern is actually a sort of camouflage. This inspired a bit of dialogue I expect will find its way into my next novel.

"You do realize that you're wearing a camouflage shirt in shades of aqua and teal, right? Where are you trying to hide, the '80's?"

The third shirt I wore for the first time today. The girls and I were sitting on Ellie's bed, reading stories before naptime, when Ada interrupted me.

"Watcha got there?" She patted my left breast. This in and of itself is not unusual. The comment that follows is usually nursing related or basic anatomy review.

She answered her own question. "Thatsa Earth."

Clearly, she was referring more to the color palette than to actual matters of scale. Still. There you have it, folks, my left breast: the entire planet.

If only she'd been at the wedding Paul and I attended a couple of weeks ago (see first paragraph above, the dress purchase was the reason for the shopping trip resulting in the shirts, the story comes full circle right here).

I am busty, but the bride is in a whole different league. At one point during the reception I actually apologized for staring like a letch. I mean, wow. I wonder what Ada would have to say to her!

Another of Ada's favorite things to say to me is, "Whatcha got der? Thatsa belly." Ah, the age of uncensored honesty and observation.


Barrie said...

Once I find a t-shirt or a pair of shorts I like, I buy a few of them in different colors. Yup. I'm a fashion plate! Laughed aloud at this post, BTW!

Sarahlynn said...

Thanks. :)

I do the multiple colors/patterns of the same style thing, too. Including with shoes. If they're great in black, I'd better have a pair in brown, also!

grace said...

I LOVED this post. too funny! :)

flatflo said...

As aforementioned bride, I was looking at some early snapshots from the wedding and relized how much decolletage I was showing. The gown's neckline wasn't really plunging and I had a bit of fabric tucked as a modesty panel to not show my bra. But still, I see a lot of boobage (a word we made up in our household) in the photos. I hope the professional pix are more flattering!

Sarahlynn said...

Laura, I want to clarify:

I don't think you were showing too much decolletage! I think you looked lovely, and your dress was gorgeous, too!

But there's no denying that you are very well endowed. :)