Monday, September 25, 2006

Bathroom Fouls

In high school and college, we had lists of "Party Fouls," which detailed specific guidelines for where it was and was not OK to puke. As an adult, I think it's high time for a non-binding list of bathroom faux pas, for general use in public restrooms.
  1. Do not bring your food into the bathroom
  2. If there are other empty stalls, do not select the one right next to an occupied stall
  3. If you sprinkle when you tinkle - clean up after your own damn self!
  4. Before leaving the stall, take a quick inventory. Is it at least as clean as you found it? Did your toilet paper actually make it into the toilet and down the pipes? Are there unsightly smears? Be aware that a second flush might be necessary. No blood. No visible feminine hygiene products or wrappings. Be neat!
  5. Don't talk on the phone while you're on the pot.
  6. If you plan to primp at the mirrors, be considerate. Don't block the only available sink or paper towel dispenser, and make sure that everyone at least has a chance to take a glance in the mirror without waiting in line behind you and your lipliner.
  7. WASH YOUR HANDS
Anything to add? Contest?

6 comments:

ccw said...

The stall selction thing drives me crazy!

How about, do not take the handicapped stall unless you are handicapped or have multiple little people and their stuff with you.

Casey said...

Those are great! Talking and eating in the bathroom just makes me to feel gross. Ech.

Jessica said...

My motto is, "If everyone would sit, no one would have to hover."

BriteLady said...

After a rather nasty experience in a restaruant bathroom during the Clayton Art Fair, i'd like to add: Throw feminine products and other trash ONLY in the appropriate receptacles. Note this does NOT include the seat cover dispenser....(talk about gross!)

And why, oh why don't they put a trash can near changing tables in bathrooms? Especially when the changing table is in the handicapped stall and the only "trash can" is the feminine product one? Try juggling a poopy diaper, diaper bag, stroller, and squirmy toddler through a door that swings the wrong way and hope that the bathroom isn't just equipped with blowdryers and no trash can....

Kay Olson said...

Great list. Here's one to add:

All that water you leave on the counter by the sink? People sitting in wheelchairs have to put their elbows in it to reach the faucet or even the paper towels to wipe up after you before they can wash hands or comb hair themselves. Gross.

Sarahlynn said...

Blue, good point! My big pregnant belly rests on that counter too, so I'm perpetually walking around with a wet shirt. So lovely. And sanitary and stuff.

Karl, not to mention the ease of urinating outdoors.

Tina, yeah, I figured that one was sort of a personal preference.

Kristi, that is just disgusting (about the Clayton Art Fair). And very good point about the trash can by the diaper changing area! I hate strollers and public restroom changing tables. I avoid both whenever possible But with a toddler - sometimes it's just unavoidable.

Jessica, I just can't do it. I'm getting better. And I'm a very neat hoverer. But . . . in a gas station bathroom? I just can't. Nonsensical or no. I don't even like a warm (i.e. recently used) toilet seat at home, where I'm pretty comfortable with my bathroom-mate.

Casey, me too!

CCW - I am GUILTY. I totally use the handicapped stall when I am pregnant, or traveling with even one small child. Assuming that I'm not cutting in front of someone with an obvious disability, of course. One foul for me!