Wednesday, February 13, 2008


On Christmas Day, 1929, my grandparents were married. Shortly before Thanksgiving 1987, my grandmother died. For the next 18-1/2 years, my grandfather kissed her picture before bed every night, and periodically shared his thoughts with her throughout each day, as he'd done for all the 58 years of their marriage.

In some ways, theirs was a very modern marriage. In others, it was completely timeless, and seems far removed from the stresses and tensions of modern life. (That is illusion, I'm sure. It's not like the 1930's were stress-free.)

Before our wedding, Paul and I wrote a statement about what marriage meant to us, which my mother read aloud during the ceremony. I remember the writing process so clearly: my early drafts sounding so academic, precise, and dry, all very big picture, while Paul's thoughts were all anecdotal. The final result was, of course, an amalgamation, as we are as a couple.

In all our youthful exuberance, these are snippets of what we felt about marriage on the eve of our own wedding: "Marriage is a partnership between two people who, as a couple, are greater than they would be individually," and, "A married couple shows affectionate caring for the times when one simply needs the other to listen and say that everything will work out alright in the end."

With examples like all four sets of our grandparents, how could we have expected any less of ourselves?

Happy Valentine's Day!


Tracey said...

That is so sweet about your grandfather. I love that type of devotion! Valentine's day always makes me think back to the start of our relationship, back when we were younger and childless and my goodness naive! I love the people we were then, but I love us even more now. We are more of a pair, a team, a couple than we ever were before. I love my partner and my family more than anything. Happy Valentine's Day to you!

Jessica said...

I love this post....Happy Valentine's Day to you, too!

Sarahlynn said...

Tracey, that is so sweet and wonderful!

Jessica, I hope yours was very happy this year. : )